Mom Bloggers For Social Good. Stella's Birth Story

What a wondrous ability we have been bestowed with. We woman, we mothers, we earthly beings. This miracle of creation. I remain in awe of myself,  my children and of the men and women that devote there lives to helping nurture and care for mothers and babies around the world. As part of Save The Children's Annual State Of The Worlds Mothers (SOWM) report I am honored to recall the births of my two children this month. 

From the first fluttering deep in my belly to the nursing of my sweet babes the first and every time. We are miraculous beings. Never have I felt more purpose on earth and connection with my body then during my pregnancies and during the labor and delivery of my children. I first shared Stellita's birth story here a week after she was born. Joaquin's birth story was written in a journal, before I started blogging and I have yet to share it here. Both days I remember with immeasurable joy and amazement. As different as my two children are so too are their birth stories. My labor was incredibly short with Stella, my second child. Four hours from when I woke with the pinch of contractions to her actual arrival qualifies as quick I think, no? I hesitate to say it was "easy" because giving birth just isn't, you mothers know. Frankly though once my water broke Stella was born within seven minutes and two pushes. And so goes the story of Stella Anita's birth. 

 via Save The Children

I woke with moderate contractions at 3 am. They were not contractions I could ignore and already about 5 to 7 minutes apart. Mr. and I quietly packed up a very asleep baby Joaquin and dropped him at my parents house a few minutes away. It was a week before my due date. My Mom and Dad met us in the night air in front of there house with smiles and wide eyes. Today would be the day! We left them with Joaquin and  headed up the hill to Feather River Hospital 30 minutes away. It was 3:45 am. My midwife, whom I like very much had gently lectured me that this labor could go very fast and to be "prepared". She mentioned that I may not have enough time to make the 30 minute drive to Paradise hospital where the midwives deliver babies. I may have to go directly to Enloe Hospital just a few minutes from my home where a Doctor would be overseeing my labor and delivery. Having had an extremely positive experience  with the midwife during my sons labor and delivery I convinced myself we had enough time to make the drive. We arrived at just about 4 am and I was bracing and breathing through now with every contraction. Although I new I was getting close and my contractions were getting really intense at about 3 minutes apart I had no idea how close. We got into a room and the nurse checked me stating I was 8 centimeters dilated. Everyone started scattering and darting and my Mr. seemed to disappear for a few minutes perhaps to spread the news? I tried to make myself comfortable. The quick feet and rustling about from the nurses did not effect my calm. I was going to meet my baby girl soon! Walking around the room and letting my belly hang down as I held the side of the bed, rocking side to side proved helpful. The midwife arrived and promptly checked me and asked if I felt the need to push. Um, really? No. I was fully dilated but had no urge to push.  While I wanted a natural child birth at this point and with my previous birthing experience I asked the midwife if I could have a pain killer of some sort. I was still experiencing an manageable pain level but was thinking ahead of what I was sure to come. She quickly told me that there was "no time" for it. "The baby was coming". I panicked just a bit. My son being only 17 months old at the time the memory of his rather painful and drawn out labor and delivery was fresh in my mind. After a few more contractions and moving to lie on the bed I asked her again if there was anyway they could give me something for the pain. Her reply was the same and this time she addressed my Mr. as well. Perhaps he had panic on his face too? Or rather she was looking for him to reassure? She was kind and yet direct and having complete confidence in my midwife I accepted her answer. I would do this completely natural and it would be okay, I told myself. I was scared.  Nauseous at this point I thought I was going to get sick. Maybe I even did get sick, my husband would most definitely remember that bit of detail. The pressure of the baby was very uncomfortable (like she was pressing down on my tail bone).Reaching the unbearable I announced I was going to sit up or stand to try and relieve the pressure I was feeling. Standing proved very helpful with my sons delivery as did walking around. There was a quick glance between nurse and midwife (the only other people in the room aside from Mr. and I). Just then as I turned my body to the side to get lift myself up my water broke and the pressure was instantly gone. I laid back down and as the midwife took her post an enormous contraction came over me. I had read and heard about the "need" to push but hadn't experienced it with my first labor and delivery. I never once had the "need" to push when delivering my son. I pushed when I was told to, with a contraction. Whammo! There was no way I wasn't going to push with what I was feeling this time. It was as if my entire body was working to push the baby out without me. The midwife was ready and with another overwhelming contraction Stellita was born. It was 7:12 am. She was tiny and pink and nursed within minutes. My eyes scanned over her admiring every detail. She had trouble staying warm for the first few hours so I held her skin to skin as much as I could and she spent some time in the Isolette under heat lamps near my bedside. I was immediately grateful for the attention and care she received from the nurses. I was in complete awe and remain so to this day. Stella is asleep a few inches away from me now as I write this. My almost three year old baby girl. She remains true to her birth story. Fiery and quick and I love her.I plan to share Joaquin's birth story, a very different experience and one that sealed my faith in midwifery and the care given in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU), on Mother's Day as he is the one that made me a mother. Come back if you wish and please share with me your birthing stories.

This post will be shared on The Gates Foundation Blog as well as Babble.com as part of my association with Mom Bloggers For Social Good. To close I'd like to share lovely Save The Children video featuring Jennifer Garner, Rachel Zoe, Alyson Hannigan and Jennifer Connelly reflecting on some first moments with baby.

Just Write

Slap slap slap. Her little feet on the floor. Slap, slap. "Ami?" Her little voice soft and kind. I open my eyes. She is standing at the side of the bed. Her face close to mine, smiling. Her curly wild mess of hair piled on top of her head she is holding a small green comb. "Hi baby" I say. She takes it as an invitation to climb onto the bed. I shove the palms of my hands down into the sheets and slowly sit up in bed. "C'mon Ami, I show you" she says as she squeezes her body between mine and the headboard. She combs my hair. Tears form at the corners of my eyes when the plastic tips scrap my scalp. "So boofull" she says softly as she continues to comb. Her hands on my shoulder she peeks around to look at my face. "I brush your hair!" Her chin bobbing up and down. "Yes baby, thank you." I say. Truth is I can't think of many other ways I'd like to be woken up. The mornings are slow and easy and I am continually thankful.

Linking to Just Write at Extraordinary Ordinary

Cheesy Romantic

At the beach a few days ago there was the happiest of couples. These two where Not elderly but not teenagers or college students either. They laughed, giggled even. Talked closely and quietly. They sat on the beach, very near the water, soaking the sun and talking. There could have been a million people there or none but those two and they wouldn't have noticed. They drank coca cola from the bottle and took there shoes and socks off. They ran into the water laughing, fully clothed the woman's laugh quicker and higher as she splashed. Gosh knows that water must have been so cold. They stopped about waist deep and pulled each other in tight. It was the stuff from movies or a cheesy romantic novel but it made me smile. I would look away a bit embarrassed, smiling to myself and then sneak a peak again. I wondered if they were on a first date, married for five years or having an affair. Maybe they left the kids with a sitter and snuck away for the afternoon. Whatever it was it was also refreshing and heartwarming. Since then I have begun planning a few such escapes for Mr. and I. For as difficult as it might be to arrange, it will be OH SO worth it. I spend so much of my time being Mommy and maybe not as much as I like as a wife. Keeping life in balance is a continuous task but one I am determined to enjoy.

Linking to Just Write

There Is No Failing At This!

I ended last week tired, discouraged and a bit cranky. Thursday and Friday were tough Mommy days for me. Stellita wasn't sleeping well and because we Cosleep, neither was I.  Being tired doesn't add to the needed patience, humor, ingenuity, determination and not to mention agility needed in my day to day as a mommy. No joke.

 I neared tears numerous times, took a few mommy-time-outs (barricading myself in the loo), and caught myself as I neared the edge of sanity and just-plain-ugly with my son. This mommy thing is tough, like really tough.

Uh-Oh Cheerios!

On these days there are moments where I begin to feel like there isn't much more to me than being a Mom. But there is. There is so much more. I just need to dust it off and revisit it again.

I had tough days on the job before having children, but nothing like this. Nothing that I couldn't politely excuse myself from and ponder over leisurely with a glass of wine later that evening in my quiet, clean home. Ya know?

I love my children.

I love watching them grow and being present for all their discoveries and developments. To encourage their adventurous hearts and imaginative minds. I don't want them to have a worn out, cranky, over-worked-under-paid Mama. 

  The good days certainly outweigh the rough ones and I am SO not just saying that.

Its true. 

Numerous other Moms have told me it will get easier and I know it will. Both my babies are under the age of three, both were planned. I insisted, as did my husband, that one of us stay at home with them.

This is what I signed up for.

And I am blessed to have this opportunity.

Seriously.

But there is no failing at this!

sombra

So can I do it for two more years? I want to.

But I want to be happy doing so. I want to be the best mom I can be. I want to be good at being their mommy even on the tough days.

 This past weekend was good. We played hard and slept...better. I even got to meet an inspiring MOM OF FOUR and blogger, Morgan!

Today I am happy and feel inspired instead of discouraged.

We celebrate another birthday tomorrow, leave for vacation Friday AND I have brownies in the oven so... how could things be anything but optimistic!!

Linking to FTLOB!

Sleeping Babes

Both of my sweet babies are sleeping right now...WOW! Whatever shall I do on such a rare occasion?

It is amazing how precious a quiet moment to ones self can quickly become once you are a mom. So, I am sure you all won't mind if I don't spend it in front of the computer. Besides it is a beautiful day outside!!

Ciao.

Dining Out with Baby

Being an Urbanite is something not entirely new to me. I have loved the atmosphere most cities evoke and spent time exploring and enjoying what they have to offer,...all before having a child. Now as a new mom I am learning how to enjoy city life in a slightly different capacity. I still love and enjoy the entertainment, history, culture and food!! I dont feel shorted or handicapped in anyway with my little guy in tow.  I guess the approach is just a little different. I want to enjoy what it is that Joaquin is seeing/doing as well as what I am seeing/doing...if that makes sense to you all (it does to me!!)

 I am not sure if it is the area in which I have lived in California most my life or if it is just the west coast lifestlye that for me, has offered an issue free experience eating out with Joaquin. My husband and I have not had one awkward experience back home when bringing Joaquin with us to dinner, not one. I cannot say the same for Charm City. Baltimore has offered the good and the bad as far as dining out with a toddler.I must mention that JQ is not a screamer and we don't leave a disaster under the highchair! So why the cold shoulder??? I think it has to do with the atmosphere these establishments want to portray,..not that they actually exist. Indeed these "hooty tooty" establishments may have done us a favor. As a result of our not so fabulous experience inside your doors we have moved on to some really great spots in our own neighborhood.  Harbor East and Fells Point have some hoppin eateries with really great food and atmosphere. These are the places you enjoy for a lazy Sunday Brunch or just the typical weeknight dinner. The crowd is younger and friendly. There is some trendy, tasty stuff out there and we plan on trying it out, all three and a half of us! Cheers!!

Double Stroller

I am going to need one of these! Oh dear. I must say a bit of worry or panic rather has set in along with reality. I am going to be a mother of TWO!! So far I have found only one double stroller I like, Phil and Teds.
Check them out!
http://www.philandteds.com/upload/index.php/en/homeus

Sleepless In California

Why, oh Why can't I sleep?
Is it because I am 22 weeks pregnant? That I can hear the pugs snoring down the hall? That I am missing my husband?
Why is it that now that Joaquin is sleeping thru the night...I can't?
(This picture is early morning..don't they look well rested!!!)

The Good Life

The good life, as I conceive it, is a happy life. I do not mean that if you are good you will be happy - I mean that if you are happy you will be good. - Bertrand Russell

Letters To Joaquin

I have been inspired to begin writing letters to Joaquin. Letters meant for him to read years from now. They will be written on everyday things, milestones, failures, realizations and funny little things. How I would have loved to peak inside my own mothers mind as she was raising us. It is after all the simple little things we do for our children that are often remembered and so special.

Stroller Envy

Being new to this whole Mommy thing I am finding out daily that even in "Mommyhood" there are cool trends! Not only do I need to be a toned, tightened, well rested and fashionable mommy but my baby and stroller too should be "on trend". I have been lucky enough to be a number of new-ish moms in the area and through this meeting and socialization I have discovered (a bit late) the fabulous-ness of the BOB jogging stroller! My husband and I had heard the name while being preggo and even took a trip down to the local sports store to check the BOB strollers out. Cool they are, in our price range they were NOT. So we quickly erased them from our minds and kept shopping. We were lucky enough to find the jogging stroller we currently have made by Schwin and are reasonably happy with it. After all you would think a stroller made by a bike company would have the same feel and it does, thank goodness. And yet,... it is still NO BOB stroller. In every Mommy group I seem to go to, every function or outing, another BOB stroller. WHY did no one tell me about this phenomenon? They are everywhere and aptly named the BOB Revolution Stroller. Still with all its light weight, high impact, off-road, shock absorbing, patented suspension system perks I cannot bring myself to trading in for one. I will not!

Breast Is Best

I was reflecting on how very lucky I have been to nurse Joaquin. Realizing there are those that are unable or unwilling to breastfeed their babies, I feel blessed. For those that are simply unwilling I am frustrated and bewildered. For those that are unable I am so very sorry. Today Joaquin and I were lying on the soft cozy bed in our spare room looking at each other and enjoying just being close as he nursed. He will touch my nose, my face, my shirt and gentle feels my hair with his fingers spread wide open. Sometimes he will stop eating to coo and baby talk a moment, turn away to look for his dad who he can hear talking to me. Then he quickly turns back and starts eating again. No one else will share this closeness with Joaquin and I know that soon he will nurse less and less and maybe that is why I am thinking of how special it is now. I want to remember these moments forever. When he is grown or not so grown(but thinks he is)...I want to remember.

What is it about the way babies smell. Their breath so sweet...